Last Saturday night, I was driving to a friend’s birthday party just after dark. It was around 7pm as I navigated my car up the main road that leads me out of my neighborhood. As I rounded the corner where Mill Creek crosses under the road, a red fox slowly came into view as he crossed the road. (I don’t know why, but all foxes are male. It’s just how I know them to exist and I don’t ask questions.)
I see the red fox regularly. He lives somewhere around that bend in the road, near the creek, perhaps in the woods that line the creek on both sides. Two years ago, in the spring, I saw a baby fox, their ears big and their bodies brown, wide-eyed and wondering at what we humans were doing in their home in the woods. (The sight of the baby fox does disprove my theory of only-male fox lineage, but that’s neither here nor there.) There has to be families of foxes living in the woods, but I tend to only see one at a time. They must be solitary creatures. I get that.
As my headlights illuminated the red fur and dark eyes of the fox, I was struck by how casual and unbothered he was, crossing the road in front of my powerful, gas-driven ton of metal. I slowed down and watched him cross. He trotted across the road in front of me, seeming to not have a care in the world, in no rush, unbothered. The fox was just doing what a fox does at dusk, which is cross the road to get wherever he needed to go. What a peaceful existence that must be.
It seemed odd that he wasn’t more hurried, more frantic. But, then, I guess, why would he be? That fox has no inkling of the chaos that surrounds him in the human world. Mr. Fox knows nothing of the crumbling of democracy at the hands of a select few billionaires. The fox, like everything in nature, continues to exist despite it all. There really was no need for him to rush across the street, as my car crept slowly toward him—I had no intention of hitting him. Maybe he knew. Or maybe he just needed to preserve his energy for his nocturnal rounds that were just beginning.
Like the fox, we all need to preserve our energy where and when we can. That doesn’t mean disengage, disconnect completely, and stick our head in the sand—though that might feel like just the right solution some days. I personally am struggling to find a balance between staying engaged and informed, take action where I am able and motived to speak up, and collapsing in a heap at the enormity of it all. I suspect most people are probably feeling somewhat similarly, at least some of the time.
THE WORLD OUT THERE will sap every ounce of energy you have, if you let it. I know this from experience. It’s taken me 45 years to learn how to preserve and protect my energy, especially in times like these. There are so damn many causes I care about, so many injustices against people I love and live around, so many problems that I want to solve, speak out against, and put my energy toward, I could easily burn out in days. That’s the problem. That burn out is, I believe, what this administration wants. They are sowing chaos, cleverly and intentionally creating as many diversions and distractions as possible, with the hope that those of us in opposition to their ideals will just give up, exhausted.
So how do we disallow the world OUT THERE to use us up and spit us out? I believe it’s about measured and intentional energy output. As I already said, there are so many causes to care about. I cannot put my finite energy into all of them. I (we) have to choose and we have to commit to a limited number of causes, then I (we) have to go hard for those causes. My personal #1 cause is ending gun violence, so I dedicate a majority of my time to volunteering with my local chapter of Moms Demand Action. Being a lead volunteer with this group, contributing in any way I can feels like tangible action and progress to me. I don’t show up for every single meeting and event, but I show up whenever I can. That’s all I need.
I also love making calls to my representative (aka the people who are elected to work for you and me). I recently downloaded the 5 Calls app, which makes it easy to call my representatives and give them a piece of my mind. I started making calls years ago, pre-Covid, and it’s a habit that stuck. A couple of times a week, when I have some down time between meetings and work, I take a walk or sit on the couch and make my calls. (The app has really simplified the process—it gives you a sample script for your issue of choice and auto-dials your representative. Bingo bango bongo, easy as can be.) Making 5 calls a day takes 10 minutes and it matters. *I always ask my representative for a response—remember, these people work for YOU!
Beyond those two actions, I’m pretty intentional about how much and which news/media I consume. I notice an immediate physiological response whenever I open a screen and start scrolling. Almost immediately, I feel tense, my heart rate goes up, and my anxiety is heightened. So I’ve taken to turning off the news, significantly reducing my time on social media, and generally being very selective about when and how I consume news. I read what I must to stay informed for my job. I tune most of the rest of it out. Because of this, I may skew a bit toward ignorance on the scale of ignorant to informed, but my sanity is at sake. My peace is worth more than anything.
Beyond choosing and committing to my few pet project causes, making my calls, and limiting my news intake, here are a few other ways I’m staying sane in 2025:
Daily meditation using InSight Timer. I start almost every day with 5-10 minutes of meditation. It’s been a game-changer for my ability to relax, be present and less reactive, and cultivate peace in chaotic times.
I get outside as much as I can. I walk without distractions whenever I can—usually first thing in the morning, once during my work day, and then again at the end of the day before the sun does down. Thank goodness for longer days! I was out walking until 6:15pm last night. Spring is coming, and not a moment too soon.
Be in community. I tend to hole up and hibernate more in the winter, what with the shorter days and lower overall energy. This winter, though, I have been intentional about gathering with my people—either at my house or at parties I’m invited to, or taking group fitness classes, or spending small chunks of time with friends at the gym, or during a long lunch date. I always feel better after I get that social, connective time.
Last year, I committed to reading more Black authors and that commitment continues into 2025. I just finished reading James—I devoured it after a friend from the gym recommended it. It should be required reading for every American. Get a copy today from the library, your local independent bookstore, or Bookshop.org. I just started Jesmyn Ward’s novel Let Us Descend. It’s a poetic and profoundly moving read.
On that note, can we collectively agree it’s time to stop making the rich richer with our purchases of convenience? Can we all PLEASE agree to stop buying everything we need off of Amazon in the name of speed and ease? I cannot continue to feel good about myself while supporting these greedy asshats that are ruining our county, our world, and who have amassed more wealth than should be legally/physically possible. Conscious Style created this handy guide to shopping for ALL the things via alternatives to Amazon. Save it. Reference it. Stop giving Bezos more money; he doesn’t need any more money.
Related, let’s all agree to stop supporting companies who are rolling back their DEI initiatives. I don’t know about you, but I believe in DEI and human rights for all humans. We live in a capitalist society, so I choose to use my money to support those businesses that align with my values. Here’s a great resource (created by Ella F. Washington) with a big list of corporate allies for DEI. Go forth and support these businesses.
Finally, this Friday, Feb. 28 is a day of resistance and economic blackout that I invite you to take part in, if at all possible. Learn more below and plan ahead. Buy nothing, spend nothing, just for one day. We can do this.
Finally: take care of yourself, in whatever ways you need and are able to. This resistance is going to be a long haul and we all need to stay resourced. Take breaks, rest, and recharge. Be like the fox. Conserve your energy where you need to, but get moving and re-engage when you can.
That alternative guide for shopping is so helpful. Thank you for sharing. And truly the 5 Calls App is the game changer! I'm still stumbling over my words when I call but I get better every time and having easy access to it makes the process so accessible. <3<3