Three years.
And things I'm digging in this new season.
Last Friday night, I was finally sitting down on the couch after a long day of work, working out, volunteering, ALL the things, I suddenly became aware of the date. March 21, 2025. Spring had officially begun the day before. But, more importantly to me in that moment, the day before also marked the anniversary of the beginning of my life without alcohol. Three years before, on March 20, 2022, I woke up SO SICK of it all—the hangovers, the anxiety, the shame spirals, the letting myself down, the entirely too controlling grip alcohol had on my life. I decided on that day—after once again letting myself down and not fulfilling my promise to myself the night before that I would “just have two drinks, not anything more”—that I was done. I decided to stop drinking. I had been contemplating the move for a while, as I wrote about extensively in a post just after my two-year sober-versary.
Three years have passed and I can honestly—and proudly—say that alcohol no longer plays a dysfunctional starring role in my life, as it did for decades. I missed my damn sober-versary this year, for God’s sake! I think about alcohol and drinking so infrequently that I did not think about it on the anniversary of the day I swore it off. Years ago, the ability to not think about alcohol was completely foreign to me. But, that day—and the new season—arrived as it always does. The difference now is that I am free… And so, so grateful to be.
Younger Rachael would not, could not believe that she could ever live without alcohol. She didn’t want to! But—more to the point—she didn’t think she could. Younger me resisted quitting drinking for so long because I was scared I would fail. I was afraid I couldn’t quit. I spoke that fear out loud in the early days of deciding to be alcohol-free. And, like most things that scare us, shedding light on it took away a little of its power. I admitted I was scared and then, poof, I felt less scared. I knew I had support, allies, and resources (which are all detailed in my post from a year ago). I’m really proud of this accomplishment, but mostly I’m in awe of how long I waited to give up this thing that added so little to my life. To be honest, though, I don’t wish I quit drinking earlier—I wasn’t ready until I was ready. I just wish I’d have known the freedom that lives on the other side of that decision.
Since I no longer have to relinquish full days to nasty hangovers, I have found a lot more space in my weeks to create, to write, to feel good in my body, and act accordingly. I’m on day 236 of a daily meditation practice that I started last year as a complement to my sobriety and personal growth. After two trips to Spanish-speaking destinations this winter kick-started my desire to speak the language more often, I’ve started a new streak of speaking Spanish. I’m getting help from Duolingo and by asking that some of my bilingual friends/yoga students only speak Spanish with me.
And in another proud, can’t-believe-I-did-that announcement: I wrote a book over the last year and a half—and it will be for sale on Monday, April 21! In it, I share the personal stories of two dozen inspiring women who are living, working, and creating our strong vibrant community in Charlottesville. My book, Badass Women of Charlottesville, includes stories that touch on universal themes of family (those we choose and those we’re born into), growth (personal and community evolution), and overcoming trauma and loss to grow into new chapters of life which are joyful even if they’re not exactly what was planned. I’ll share information here about how to purchase the book when it’s available for sale next week. I would be so grateful for your support of my writing and this book. I poured my heart into this project and it’s really only possible thanks to the generosity of time and spirit of the amazing, badass women who allowed me to interview them and document their stories. A portion of proceeds from each book sale will be donated to The Women’s Initiative, which provides free mental health counseling that’s trauma-informed and culturally responsive—meeting women where they are in Charlottesville.
Other things that I’ve been digging, reading, and listening to lately:
White Lotus, season 3. Parker Posey is a national treasure. That is all.
Raising Lazarus, by Beth Macy. I just finished this one, the follow-up to Macy’s book Dopesick, which was made into an outstanding Hulu series. Beth was a reporter for my hometown newspaper, The Roanoke Times, for years. I still remembering seeing her byline when the paper arrived at our house daily. Her work was part of what inspired me to pursue a career in journalism (my first job out of college) and as a writer. I find her investigation into the opioid crisis to be so interesting and interconnected to the shit-show of American politics in my lifetime.
Ariana Newhouse’s Respectful Smartass substack is exactly what it says it is: smart, respectful, and a bit smart-ass-y. It’s silly and serious, with poems and humorous essays. It’s written by a friend’s niece (that’s how I found it) who recently moved to New York and promptly got laid off. Her essay about New York interactions brought me right back to visits to the city in my 20s. And that’s timely, since I’m preparing for another visit to the Big Apple during spring break next week! (I know, I know, I’m such a tourist—I promise not to call it “The Big Apple” when I’m there!)
Another dear friend of mine writes a funny, sweet, thoughtful blog over at Diary of a Hungry Girl. Check that out, if you’d like, too!
Lately, I’ve been literally digging into some Barebells protein bars. I’m in my protein er, my macro-tracking era. I don’t necessarily love it, but it is what it is. This body ain’t getting any younger or easier to maintain, AMIRITE? Eating more protein is the answer (for me) to building muscle, feeling full longer, and help keep me overall health in check (weight being one measure of health, but also—how do my clothes fit? How’s my energy? How’s my digestion? etc. etc. etc.) These are the best protein bars I’ve found—they taste really good and pack 20g of protein per bar for about 200 cals.
On repeat this month on Spotify: Bjork.
One more thing I’m digging: trying my hand at vegetable gardening for real this year. Got myself a planter box, started some broccoli, carrots, and tomatoes from seed… gonna see how it goes!
What’s floating your boat this spring?